Life is divine chaos. Abandon tranquility and embrace it.
could i pay someone to take over my body who actually knows how to look after it so they can like. make me healthy again and then let me take over once i’m fit n healthy
You mean a personal trainer and a nutritionist
no i mean some sort of supernatural being who can do literally all of the work for me
So like the ghost of a personal trainer and nutritionist
I need to have as much wild sex as possible so one day I can become an inappropriate old lady that blurts out things like “when I was your age I got a concussion after being bent over a desk” and then my family can be like “grandma please, you’re making easter dinner really uncomfortable” and it’ll be great
ask any teenager what type of music they listen to and 99 percent of the time they’ll say ‘anything but country’
Woman yelling at her daughter: For God's sake, you are 23 and you DO NOT need a Pooh stuffed animal.
Daughter: I want it and I'm buying it.
Woman: This is ridiculous.
Me: If it makes you feel any better, I'm 19 and I just bought a doll for myself.
All the other CMs: Yeah, you're never too old for Disney.
And the random guy in line with an entire Vinylmation box: To be honest, these are for me.